july 13th, 2022

i have a significant interpersonal memory that, to me, represents love akin to watching my cranky chihuahua meet another chihuahua
& undergo an immediate temperamental shift to a kind of silent, plucky interest & curiosity... two people of a same "type" who
can't recognize that "type" in themselves until they see its qualities assembled in another person, leading them to discover
an aspect of themselves in the same moment that they discover another person with which to relate about it

something that represents a really effortless sense of equality, neutrality, levelness, evenness, sameness, naturalness.
significant ease & relief on those terms. something that doesn't aim to be enrapturing but to express a tailored
& modest positivity that may ironically turn out to be enrapturing on the grounds of that modesty...
all much simpler in practice than the length of these two paragraphs suggests, basically

i have another significant interpersonal memory that, to me, represents love rooted
in a kind of perverse desire to feel possessed, & does aim to be enrapturing, maybe